Time To Get Real

In just 3 short days, on August 10, it will mark my one year anniversary of having this blog.  This blog started out as Eat, Live, Dance, Repeat - which later became My Inner Butterfly when I got my own domain name.  

One year ago, this is what I looked like.

And now?

To say I'm not happy with this would be an understatement.  Who starts a weight loss blog, only to gain weight (I started this blog weighing in at 148 pounds; I now weigh 157 pounds)?  Granted, I did accomplish some great things in the past year.  I ran my first 5K - something I never thought I'd do.  I also finished an entire rotation of Xtrain (um, which I gained weight on).  

As Dr. Phil would say....

It's time to get real.

I have not done what I set out to do with this blog.  When I started writing here, I had high hopes.  I just knew that "now was the time."  That 2013 would be my year.  2013 isn't over yet, but it will be coming to a close sooner rather than later.  

I feel like maybe I've been going about this all wrong.  I come up with these grand plans, and when I don't do 100%, I quit.  I'm an all-or-nothing gal when it comes to weight loss, and I know that I can't think that way.  I tend to think that if I'm not doing everything at once like "I'm supposed to be," then it's not good enough, and it will never work.

But how will I know it won't work if I don't try?  

I've heard time and time again that many people are successful with making small changes.  And even though it won't get me to my goal weight as fast as I'd like, I'd like to think that it would get me further than everything I've tried in the past year.

Weight loss also doesn't just happen with some physical changes (working out and eating less).  It also needs to go from the inside out.  My goal with this blog was to work on myself, from the inside out.  I've been focusing so much on the outside, that I feel I've gotten away from the core of myself.  I need to reign myself back in and focus more on balance, which is something I've touched on in the past few weeks.

From this day on, this blog will not just be about weight loss.  It will be about my journey to find myself, and to truly finding my inner butterfly - something I have neglected, even though it's one of the most imperative parts of losing weight.

I may not see the changes I want in the least amount of time, but I know that I will be better off for it in the long run.  It's time to shed my cocoon.  It's time to find my butterfly.