Balance

Hey everyone!  It's Friday, so I'm in a good mood.  That means that I only have one more week until the big company event, only a few more days until I move, and a week until I'm on vacation - for one whole week!!  The end is in sight, people!!

So since I've been MIA + posting some Debbie Downer posts, I thought I'd share what I've been up to lately, and some plans for the next few months.  And, um, can you believe Fall is already almost here?!  The weather is even changing - it's feeling a bit cooler and crisper.  I do have to admit, I love Fall.  Sure, it's no summer, but I just love the smells, the decorations, the apple orchards, the pumpkin patches, the Fall leaves - everything!!  It's a season of change.  And I plan on making it that way for myself.

Anyway - what have I been up to?  Well, this work event obviously.  It's been kicking my butt.  Right now, our numbers are showing that about 2,000 people are going to be there, which is a record for this event.  You can imagine my stress levels - especially since it's the first year I'm in charge of it.  It'll be next weekend.  Hopefully I'm not too busy, and I can take some pics to share with everyone.

I've also been packing, packing, packing!  And cleaning.  Some deep cleaning is on the agenda for this weekend.  I'm a little worried that I'll get charged for the carpet - seeing as my cat is a spoiled brat that likes to pee on the carpet when the litter box isn't 100% clean.  I found a spot in the corner in my living room that is just disgusting, because it was behind the TV and entertainment center (it's a corner entertainment center), and I never really noticed it until a few weeks ago.  So I've been using a ton of Nature's Miracle.  *Sigh*  Pretty sure I'll be charged for that.  You probably didn't want to know all that, and now you probably all think I'm gross and filthy, ha!

And last but not least - my EX (yes, you read that right - I finally kicked him to the curb) has been in a bit of legal trouble.  Nothing huge, but enough to put him in jail or go through a program.  He had court yesterday.  And when we were in the room with the lawyer, he decided to start blaming everything on me.  It was my fault he was in this situation.  And I finally saw the light.  He will never change.  He will always be a child.  Here I have been there for him since the beginning of all of this, supporting him, and he pulls that crap.

I've had enough of being bullied.  I've had enough of him making me feel like I'm not worthy.  I've had enough of him telling me I'm fat.  A few weeks ago, I kicked him out of my apartment because he had been basically living with me for free (he couldn't pay his rent anymore because he was paying his lawyer, so he moved back in with me).  No more.  The whole time I have been helping him, he has not been appreciative (he said that I'm not helping him at all, and that I'm nothing to him) or respectful.  He has been on dating web sites and trying desperately to meet new girls.

Enough.  He is gone.  And now I can finally focus on me.  100%.

So as you see - Fall really will be my "season of change."

In weight-loss related news, I stepped on the scale this morning, and saw that I've lost a couple pounds.  Which is really weird.  I haven't been counting calories or exercising, and I've been eating more than I should be.  Seriously, I'm so confused.  It seems that when I become a little more relaxed and stop being so obsessed with everything, the weight comes off.  But when I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing - counting calories and exercising, I gain weight.  What gives??

This has given me good reason to believe that balance is something I need to be working on going forward.  I mentioned it a little in my last post.  I'll be talking about it more and more in the coming weeks.

Thanks for hanging in there with me.  I hope people actually still read my blog, ha!  It can only get better from here - and I have a feeling it will!!